Ninjas RUUUULLLLLEEEEEE!

[deanl]

Hey there.

"Before you continue, you need to get pumped, really really pumped. So I wrote three short movies scripts (by myself) to get your blood hot and crazy. The first film, Ninja, Please, introduces the ways of the ninja. The second film, Ninja Babe is sexual. The Ultimate Battle introduces the ninja's stupidest opponent. Hopefully you?ll enjoy them as much as I like looking at naked ladies."

Ninja, Please

Scene 1:

Ninjas walk down street to go eat some food. Ninjas are all wearing black and looking totally sweet. There is some awesome music playing in the background to get the audience really pumped. Then some dude jumps out of nowhere. The ninjas start beating this guy's *** bad. Then the dude starts trying to run away, but one ninja pulls out a ninja star (ninja weapon) and throws it at the dude. The ninja star cuts the guy's head totally off. The head rolls over near this old dog that looks at the head and barfs all over the place, including the camera, which is awesome. The ninjas start flying and everybody starts screaming. Then the scene ends.

Scene 2:

A ninja is sleeping at his house. Some idiot walks by singing a super annoying song. Then the ninja wakes up super pissed and ready to rock. The guy just keeps walking and singing, while the ninja starts cutting down a building. When the guy walks by the building, it falls on him. (When the building is falling, a guitar will be wailing hard in the background.) There will be a close up of the dude's feet sticking out from under the building. The feet explode all over the place, because of blood pressure. Then we see that the ninja was playing the guitar. Then all these babes start coming out of nowhere and the ninja starts wailing ever harder (if that's even possible). Then the camera starts fading out and then explodes.

END

-I thought of this script right before bedtime. I got so pumped I almost kicked my mom right in the face!

Despin out.

[Esparto]

written all by yourself you say?

hmm, it seems like you have replaced a story with pure sensless violence, ...not that that's a bad thing. [img]wink.gif[/img]

you can't seriously make this can you? although i must admit, ive done Kung fu with less of a plot.

it would certainly be entertaining as long as its not too long

good luck

<font color="#a62a2a" size="1">[ July 30, 2002 04:12 PM: Message edited by: Esparto ]</font>

[deanl]

Hey there.

Ninja BABE





Scene 1:

There is this super rich stupid idiot who lives in a humongous house. At his house, this guy has babes lying all over the place. The next scene is hot. The guy takes this super hot babe back to his room to make-out. The audience will think that the hot babe is a normal babe, but, yeah right, she's a ninja. The ninja woman smashes the guy's head like a melon. Then all these dogs come out of nowhere and the ninja woman has to beat the dogs' asses. First she kicks this one dog right in the nuts. The dog screams and jumps out the window. Then she jumps in the air and kicks two dogs in the nuts at once! Both dogs evaporate. Every time the ninja woman kicks nuts, a guitar squeals hard. Then the ninja woman has to battle the boss dog. The boss dog is huge. Before the boss dog can attack, she uppercuts the boss dog's nuts so hard that the boss explodes. Then the guitar squeals REALLY hard and explodes.

End

-This script is awesome.

Is this better.

Despin out.

[SoulJacker]

THAT FUCKIN RUUUULLLLLEEEEEE!

Honest...

[GREATwarEAGLE]

Wasn't this a MERCHANT IVORY production?

[deanl]

Hey there.

The Ultimate Battle

Scene 1:

Dark smoke fills the scene and pump up music slowly gets louder. The audience sees a ninja and his girlfriend eating at a super expensive restaurant. The girlfriend is so hot that steam is coming out of her mouth or hair. Some old idiot is sitting by the couple. The idiot is giving the girlfriend "the eye" and popping like 16 boners. But the ninja sees the boners and the music really pumps up. The audience knows this guy is dead meat for sure. But out of nowhere, the old idiot pulls off his jacket to show that he is a pirate with lasers and everything. The ninja is like yeah right who cares and then pops the biggest boner ever, bigger than the biggest blackest boner alive. The ninja's boner smashes the entire restaurant. Every single one of the pirate's boners explodes while making a whistling sound. The ninja looks back at his girlfriend. She smiles and they pork.

END

-While writing this script, I head-butt my dog so hard that we both screamed.

Despin out.

[jack jutson]

Theres a song by a canadian band called Girls are SHort and the only lyrics to it are 'WE'RE THE KARATE NINJAS AND WE'RE GONNA **** YOU UP, WE'RE THE KARATE NINJAS AND WE'RE GONNA **** YOU UP....'

[jack jutson]

either that, or Cowboys from **** by Pantera haha

this movies so whacky it just might work

[deanl]

Hey there.

"If you still aren?t pumped up, then you?re a moron. Luckily, I can help. I wrote two more scripts to really get you pumped. On the top, these movies may appear foolish or irrelevant, but as you?ll see, the characters in them are pretty cool, and work on many levels, because they pump you up. The King?s Gold/Babes is about teamwork and friendship."

The King's Gold/Babes

Scene 1:

In the olden days, there was this sweet king that had mounds of gold and babes. These pirates decided to steal the mounds and surrounded the castle and everybody freaked, except the king who was like ?Chill homies, I?ll handle this **** .?

The pirates stood outside the castle walls and were like ?You think you are so cool, but guess what, you?re not. Good luck dying!? Then the king replied ?Yeah right. How would you like to meet my best friends??

Then out of nowhere there was a small sound of a guitar wailing really really hard behind the hills. The wailing started getting louder and louder and louder. Then out of nowhere there was this one sweet *** ninja standing on top of a huge hill. Everybody was like ?Woooooooooooow!? He was wearing all black and he had this jet red guitar in his hands. Then smoke smoked over the hills like trains. But the smoke was ninjas. And the pirates saw about a billion ninjas with guitars standing on top this his huge hill. And they started to wail?

When the ninjas wailed on their guitars, the pirates started spraying diarrhea on each other and loved it. And when they wailed harder, the pirates sprayed harder. As the ninjas sauntered down the hill, the pirates? chests and butts exploded. (They died from this.) Then the ninjas finally reached the boss pirate who was really huge. Out of nowhere the boss pirate pulled out this baby banjo and tried to fiddle with it like a little baby-baby. The ninjas were like ?Yeah right.? and all the billions of ninjas surrounded the boss pirate. Half of the ninjas all combined to form the biggest guitar in the universe. The other half formed the second biggest boner in the universe. Then the huge guitar pointed right at the pirate, who was like ?Holy CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!? Before the pirate could even do anything, the super boner slapped against the guitar making the hugest wail ever to happen anywhere ever. The pirate exploded so hard that every single one of his kids he would have had exploded and all of his grandparents exploded along with his neighbors and people who he merely said ?hello? to.

Then there was this huge concert at the castle. All the babes in the castle morphed into this humongous female crotch. The huge boner and crotch porked softly, while slamming into the guitar and wailing. And guess what, the king sat on top of this huge pile of gold and babes and laughed his frigg?n *** off about how stupid the pirates were.

END

-this script is so hot it could make Janet Reno open up a paint can with her ding dong.

Despin out.

[steven_craig]

moooorrrreeeeee teeeeeeeeaaaaaaaa mister braithwhaite?

you have got me so pumped